Will i be a good mother?

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pregnant lady on the beach

Pregnancy is a process of change: in the body, in the emotions, in the way of thinking. Sometimes changes bring anxiety and worry. But you don't have to doubt it!

 

"Will I be a good mother to my baby?" How do I do that? ”These are some of the questions most pregnant women usually ask. As hormones cause intense emotional changes, it is normal for a woman who becomes a mother (especially for the first time) to be anxious or even afraid that she will not succeed. What should you answer to yourself and how can you deal with this kind of anxiety? It's simple: before you end up asking if you're going to be a good mother, it's a good idea to answer 5 other questions that will get you out of the dilemma!

 

What does maternity mean for you?

For most mothers, even those who are having their first child, motherhood is an abstract concept. Seeing other women raising their children and comparing yourself to them is not the best criterion for evaluating your own performance. Especially if you are going to have your first child, it is unfair to take it for granted that you will be an inadequate mother because you believe that you cannot do what other moms around you are doing.

 

How do you judge Your mother?

The most important person who can influence a woman in how she will behave when she has children is of course her own mother. As women mature, their view of how good their mother has become (even unconsciously) crystallizes in them. Some women find the maternal standard too high and believe that their mother did such a good job that they could never reach it. Some other women, on the other hand, judge so harshly and condemn their mother, that they want to do everything not to look like her when they have children. Both of these options hide pitfalls. For better or worse, parents inherit from their children values ​​and attitudes that affect their adult lives. This does not mean that a expectant mother should try to reproduce the maternal model and look worthy of her own mother or, on the contrary, reject it completely. Every woman is a special personality and motherhood will definitely adapt to her own character. She can keep some positive values ​​of her parents, maybe even reject others, but that doesn't mean they have to become a brake on her life and stress her out in pregnancy!

 

How are you as a person?

Every woman's personality plays an important role in how she will be as a mom. An organizational woman is likely to become an organizational mom, a woman with artistic tendencies can become a mom-artist and so on. We say "it can" or "it's possible" because pregnancy is a process that transforms women. A expectant mother should not be anxious and constantly criticize herself. This is because women by nature are flexible and motherhood, as you will find, will force you to change some of your habits or some of your characteristics (to some extent) to fit the small and wonderful in your new life. your little creature!

 

How flexible are you with your priorities?

From the moment your baby is born, all your planning and all your priorities change radically. This can be stressful and can lead to the dilemma of "will I be a good mother or not?", Because you feel pressured to put aside your own "want" for the sake of your baby. But it is a real dilemma, since once you have decided to have a child, you have to reconsider your priorities. If e.g. Career is just as important to you, then you should know in advance that the more time you spend at work, the more time you will deprive your children. But if you and your partner have come up with a life plan that balances things out, then you don't have to worry about it in advance!

 

Do you take risks?

Motherhood is a constant surprise. This sounds stressful, but in the end there is also the beauty of life with children! Every day you will learn new things and evolve as a parent as your children grow up. There is no need to worry in advance about whether you will be a good mother, as it is something you will not learn in advance. You will be called upon to make many decisions and risks as your child grows up. Even if you are not ready, you will find that you will learn to take them!

 

Then, what?

Every expectant mother's anxiety about whether she will be good in the role of mother is legitimate and understandable. But don't let that deprive you of the joy of bringing a child into the world. Above all, make sure you share these questions with your partner and loved ones. The best way to calm down and alleviate anxiety syndromes is to get the opinion of a person you love, but also to be open to those who support you. Especially your partner, who as a future dad has the same worries, is able to understand you!

happy baby